Volume One
Chapter Seven — Steps to Authenticity
June: Feelings
1. The biggest complication about being human is that humans have both thoughts and feelings. Many of these feelings are connected to the thoughts. An example is a fire or flood that caused all of the property belonging to the character and their family to be destroyed. The house is no longer habitable. Personal treasures are gone. Family heirlooms are gone. All of the things one needs in this world, such as clothing, appliances, furniture, or a vehicle of some type are no longer there. They have been reduced to ash or unusable junk. How would a directly impacted human feel about something as life altering as this? The feelings may fluctuate between intense sadness, a feeling of desperation and hopelessness, fear about what to do next, and intense anger at life or God. They may say, "Why did this have to happen to me?"
2. In situations like these, the biggest obstacle to acceptance and peace is the character's attachments to the home and its contents. The character felt secure in this home, surrounded by these now destroyed belongings. The idea of security has given the house and pieces of property additional meaning. The idea that "these are mine" has meant something to the character. And when there isn't anything left, what does it mean then? Where will they sleep and what will they wear? Will they be homeless and, if so, what would this mean for the involved character? In this scenario that happens in real life all too frequently, the character's thoughts and feelings become one big, jumbled-up mess. What to do? How can you more easily separate the two?
3. Now you've finally discovered what was truly meant in the original A Course in Miracles when the term insane was used to describe humans. It isn't because I was talking trash about them, it's because being human is so confusing. Even those who aren't dealing with a major stressor like losing a home to a fire or flood, are in some state of confusion most all of the time about whatever they might be going through. They have to sort through the tangled-up web of thoughts and feelings and attempt to function in this world at the same time. My hat's off to each of you. But how can more soul presence help to sort thoughts from feelings?
4. More soul presence is the primary purpose of this new version of an old book. We want to promote peace and love with less ego, less fear, more soul, and more love. This may sound impossible in today's crazy world, but this is the only hope here. Your soul will help you to process all of your feelings, but the one thing it can't do, the one thing it isn't allowed to do, is to interfere with and control your thoughts. The first step in any ordinary or extraordinary situation you may be involved in is to clear out your incessant thoughts, so that you can process your feelings. And this can't happen right away after a large amount of stress. Give it time. Be patient. And when you're ready, ask "What would love have me do in this situation? Who does it want me to talk to and what should I say?"
5. Guidelines:
Pick a time of day that suits you best and read the step that corresponds to the appropriate month and date. This is your starting point. Simply reflect on what the step means to you and ways to put it into practice. Accept whatever feelings come to the surface as you work your way through the steps. These steps are the beginning of a transformation where love replaces fear, which is no easy feat. Be patient with yourself. You are doing what few have ever been able to do. Now you have the means. Just add a little willingness and you will be a more soulful and less ego-driven being in just a year's time. Godspeed.
6. June 1
Which feeling or set of feelings do you find to be the most difficult to deal with?
7. June 2
Do you have negative thoughts about your feelings, such as ones that say you shouldn't have certain feelings?
8. June 3
Can you see that moving towards acceptance of your feelings will help you move away from conflict with them?
9. June 4
Give an example of a recent time when you judged your feelings as bad, and you felt as if you were a bad person for having them.
10. June 5
Give an example of a time when you talked about a situation and your feelings about this situation with a friend or family member, and you walked away feeling ashamed.
11. June 6
Have you ever knowingly or unknowingly shamed someone in an effort to help them by controlling them?
12. June 7
Between thoughts and feelings, which ones may be more trustworthy in the sense that they can lead to a greater level of understanding and peace?
13. June 8
Give an example when information you discovered later wasn't true, and it produced strong, reactive feelings.
14. June 9
Give an example when a feeling prompted you to use your mind to obtain factual information about a situation.
15. June 10
Do you use your mind or does your mind use you?
16. June 11
Can you make time on a daily basis to sort through your thoughts and feelings and find the true feelings that are not just reactions to thoughts?
17. June 12
Can you be compassionate towards others without feeling so bad about their situation that you lose your own sense of peace?
18. June 13
Unhappy thoughts lead to unhappiness. True or false?
19. June 14
Happy thoughts lead to happiness. True or false?
20. June 15
All feelings come from your soul, but the loving, positive ones that are not instigated by thoughts are considered true feelings. All other feelings are considered transitory ones that lead to truth once properly processed.
21. June 16
Feelings that originate from love need to be discerned from feelings that lead to love.
22. June 17
You cannot master your feelings, but you can allow your feelings to master you when you are ready.
23. June 18
Reflect on a time when you made a decision not to do something. For example, not take a new job that ended up being the correct decision because you made it based on your gut instincts.
24. June 19
Anger is a potent feeling. It originates with thoughts about the unfairness of actions and situations. Moving forward, when I feel angry I will make it my habit to sit with it until I am ready to release it.
25. June 20
A planned release of anger, so that love can replace it, includes things such as remediation. Oftentimes others do need to hear how their actions have impacted you in negative ways.
26. June 21
Love includes all feelings, like an envelope has space for a letter or card. My job is to love all of my feelings.
27. June 22
Because some of my feelings may come from inaccurate information or misinformation from someone who may have wanted to deceive me, I am always willing to apologize to anyone that my feelings mislead me about.
28. June 23
Because the ego isn't always forthcoming, I will make it my habit, moving forward, to listen to the deeper content and not just the surface words. This will help with processing my own feelings.
29. June 24
Moving forward, I will listen to my own words and will dig deeper to discover my own true feelings about any subject.
30. June 25
What are ways I like to use to release my own pent-up feelings?
31. June 26
I refuse to beat myself up for having this feeling or that feeling.
32. June 27
I accept that my feelings make me, me.
33. June 28
I am a beautiful, feeling character and soul.
34. June 29
If someone would like to process their thoughts and feelings with me, I will be honest in setting up boundaries about whether this would be a healthy activity for me or not.
35. June 30
I cannot allow anyone to use me as they see fit. I will decide my role in any relationship based on my comfort level, which will always be based on my feelings.
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